Run With It

My last post was in February. Dang, that's quite a while! But honestly, that pretty much relates perfectly to how my life has been on so many different levels. Things have been insane. And even more than just insane, you could say I've been on a downhill battle in my faith. My relationship with God has been...well, basically in the desert.

Have you guys ever just had those disastrous streaks in which you have no motivation or yearning to even put effort into talking to Jesus? It's rough. I don't know why we put ourselves through that misery. It's definitely a reflection and reminder of our humanity though right? Check this out.

Isn't that legit?! Ah, that gets me every single time! But seriously, that's how I just recently felt hardcore. So I've been going through some changes...let me take that back. I've been going through numerous changes, not just some. And in my transitioning I got so wrapped up in my own life that I just pushed Jesus out of the picture. Every once in a while I would say a quick "Hey God," kind of prayer. Heartfelt would not be used to describe my recent prayers.

If I haven't mentioned in earlier posts, I am in love with writing. It's my passion for sure. Well that love for writing also plays into my relationship with God. See, I love journaling. I'll whip out my journal and just write to my heart's content all that is going on in my life. My heartaches, questions, dreams and desires, thanksgivings, and just in general all of my prayers will be poured out in writing. It truly is beautiful the way in which we each have our own unique ways in which we connect most easily to God. For some it's writing, music, praying in the silence...whatever it may be, I encourage you to embrace that. It's a gift from God, don't take if fore granted. I've made that mistake too many times with my journaling and in the long run it always causes me more distress than necessary. Good thing Jesus is literally always just waiting for us (like in the cartoon above) to begin the journey with us once again.

Okay, getting back on track, the point of discussing my love for writing and journaling is that I just recently FINALLY pulled my journal back out. Ah, long time coming let me tell you. So yes, I pull my journal out and I'm just writing away right? After I finished my journal entry, I flipped to the next page and just began writing some random phrases, whatever came to mind, in different fonts. Here let me just show you what I'm talking about.

So there's an example random journal entry for ya. But okay, here's the part that I just love!
The instant I finished writing the last bit on that page that I did, Jesus so simply and gently said to me, "You're listening Hannah. Now run with it."

How incredibly beautiful is that? How often does God gently remind us of something, or give us just the push we need to keep going on this extravagant journey in life and we maybe 'hear' His words, but that's it. And yet here He was lovingly telling me to run with it. I just can't get over it. I can't get over Him.

God always, always knows just what He's doing. Just when I think I know my own heart, He is probably up there laughing at my human ignorance. And that's when He'll tell me, "No my child, here's what you really need."
So next time you hear God telling you something or answering your prayers in ways you didn't expect. Run with it. You're in the best of hands.

We are His

So I woke up like way exhausted today not wanting to move an inch right? Well after a few minutes of mentally preparing myself, I finally got up and booked it for work so I wouldn't be late. And do you ever have those moments where you turn to your favorite radio station, fingers crossed, that your current favorite song will play? Who are we kidding, I am pretty sure this happens to everyone at least once in their lifetime.

Well this particular morning, before even turning to my station, I was singing Hold You Up by Shane Harper (so good, it's a must listen to!) After a few seconds of just singing aloud to myself, I turn to my station and give or take within a couple more seconds, you'll never guess what song came on. Yes. None other than Hold You Up. Bahh! Needless to say, I just found myself smiling as I let the song and the lyrics just speak to me as they each and every time I listen to the song. Which I highly recommend that anyone reading this right now take the time to go look up the song. Scratch that, better yet I will just pull it up on here for you! Check the lyrics out, they're so legit. 

I just want to point out one line from the song that just speaks to my heart every time I hear it. 

"The demons will haunt you and try to steal what you know." 

Wow, I can't say I've ever heard it better put than that right there! When I hear those lyrics, I am automatically brought back to all of the moments that I find myself immensely struggling with all of the doubts in my mind that separate me from Christ and His love for me. All of those moments that I find it hard to see my own self worth. All of the times that I feel self inflicted harm will be an escape. All of the constant drumming of lies in my head. 

How spot on is it that the demons, that the devil, will work at our very souls to steal and mask all that we know to be true. If the devil thinks that by being able to slither into our lives and our hearts, he will then be able to tangle our thoughts just enough to pull us away from Jesus and ultimately destroy us, then let me be the first to say how wrong he is. 

Who is he to think that he would ever have even the slightest chance at stealing Christ's love for us? Who would he be to try and steal our self worth when we are so beautifully made in the image and likeness of our loving Father, God. Let me tell you. he is no one. 

We are each unrepeatable, irreplaceable daughters and sons of our God, and that right there is enough to put the devil back in his place.  

I just cannot get over the depth of the lyrics in this song and the hopeful message that it portrays. I honestly feel like I could just go on and on about this song and the endless ways that it speaks to my heart! But I want to leave a challenge for anyone reading this, that you might take this song and really just dive into the lyrics and meaning of the words yourself. I guarantee there will be something special for you somewhere in this song. 

Take heart, my friends! For the devil stands no chance at stealing any tiny bit of who we are when we entrust ourselves completely to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He is ours, and we are His.  

That Heart That is Meant to Love You

Well I have genuinely slacked in writing on here for a long time, oops! But I'm back with more thoughts for whoever wants to take the time to read my ramblings!

So what I want to focus on in this post is a quote I came across on Pinterest. Yes, I am very much so into pinterest I must confess. May as well get it out of the way early for any of you haters out there. Just kidding though, you all are great, pinners or not! =)

Alright so here is the quote...

Your flaws are perfect for the heart that is meant to love you.

Hang on now, re-read that and really just let it sink in. Heck, read it several times actually! It's worth re-reading!

Your flaws are perfect for the heart that is meant to love you. 

That phrase in itself is so beautifully written; so much depth to such a small single statement. After I read that, I basically broke it down into sections. Flaws. That instantly stood out to me because so often I tend to zoom in on my mistakes and failures. My own flaws. Then continuing on not even a few words later flaws is so quickly followed by the word perfect. Perfection. Jesus Christ. My Savior and Redeemer. He is the epitome of perfection, ah how I adore Him.

Then, the last little bit. The heart that is meant to love you. I just love the wording in that because it isn't the heart that will love you, or the heart that does love you. But instead, the heart that is so wonderfully meant to love you. 

And speaking as a woman who is a sucker for romance, it's oh so easy to get wrapped up in looking for that sweet gentleman, my prince charming, who will sweep me off my feet to no end. But as I read that quote, I was instantly brought back to my one true love, my dear sweet Savior.

Before any charming man captures my heart and loves me, it is Jesus Christ that is meant to love me day in and day out. Every second of every single moment. In every breath. He is extraordinarily, to no end, loving us, flaws and all!

Just the other day during my lunch break from work, I went to the nearby Catholic church to just spend time ravishing in quality time with my love. I caught a glimpse of my very own scars and was quickly reminded of all of my flaws. The ways in which I continually let down my friends and family, and even myself. As I cried out to God begging for His comfort, He simply told me this.

"My princess, my flower, my rose. Look at me. And remind yourself how much I love you. I would die again for you every single day just to be near you. Just to listen to you. Have I not taken care of you in the past? What would make now any different?"

And that is so true. Regardless of my flaws, His love remains. In all actuality, we are all so perfect for the heart that is meant to love us. And that is Jesus Christ. Always and forever.

And as I leave you with those thoughts, I encourage each of you to embrace the adventure that is set before each of us as we allow Christ to pursue us. After all, there is no better heart meant to love us than His.

the Answer

I want to overcome.
     Jesus overcame.

I want to be strong.
     Jesus is my rock.

I can't fight the tears from coming.
     I meet with Christ on calvary through those same tears.

My scars just remind me of my past and all I want to hide.
     Jesus strengthens my wounds, softens my heart, and redeems me through my scars.

My voice is lost in the chaos of the world.
    Each word I speak is a melody to my Lord.

Loneliness envelops me regardless of all those I'm surrounded by
     Jesus wraps me in His arms day and day again.

I feel beaten down and broken.
     Jesus may stretch me, but He will never break me.

I begin to find my strength in the Lord.
     Jesus catches me as I take a leap of faith.

I am able to overcome the heartache and treacherous waters.
     And again, without fail...

Jesus is the answer.


   

Reminder of God's Infinite Love

A good year ago or so I got a text from a friend and he had asked me, rather excitedly, "Do you know what today is?!"

I replied..."Uhmm, the 16th?" I was just assuming he was asking about what the actual date was. 

He then responded, "Today is an unrepeatable, irreplaceable mystery from God." 

Mind. Blown. Like, really though. How often do we take the time to reflect on the fact that each single day cannot be repeated? And not only that, but each day literally just exudes mystery from our Lord? It's truly beautiful and miraculous. 

I was so wrapped up this morning thinking about everything that's currently stressing me out along with all that I need to be working on and getting done when I God nudged me just enough to finally open my heart and eyes to His words. 

"I won't give you more, more than you can take. I might let you bend, but I won't let you break. And know, I'll never, ever let you go." Don't you forget what He said. 

We are all so often concerned with all that God is throwing at us it's just so easy to forget the mystery that each day holds and the beauty that is unveiled to us throughout the day. And the words in this song are just a perfect reminder of God's infinite love for each of us. When we feel as though we're trudging through treacherous waters, God is allowing us to turn our lives over to Him in a whole new way! The more we surrender ourselves to Him and His will for our lives, the more we are able to find authentic peace and happiness! 

And yes, that in no way means it will be easy to surrender to Him. But looking back at these lyrics, He's going to stretch us and bend us, but He will never break us. Our God is a loving, caring, and genuine God and Father. The more He stretches us, the more He is giving us the opportunities to surrender to Him and even more so, to grow in and through Him. He wants to take us on a journey outside of our comfort zones and outside of ourselves. That, my friends, is an astounding gift and mystery! 

I encourage each of you to embrace each day by remembering what God has told you, and continues to tell you. He might let you bend, but He'll never let you break. 

When I Cannot Stand I'll Fall On You

"Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are Easter people and hallelujah is our song." - Bl. John Paul II

Today is Easter! Praise God, we are just too blessed! 


I started off my Easter morning absolutely perfect! This past week was just rough. I hit some treacherous waters and was just feeling lost and hurt. I was really able to meet with Christ on calvary through my pain. Well this morning I woke up 4:30 to head home to make it in time for 8:30 mass with my family. So after much patience (or attempted patience) in scraping the ice off my car, filling up with gas, emptying trash, and straightening the apartment, I was finally on the road. 


For a two and a half hour drive, Jesus just took me with Him on a journey through thick and thin! That's how I felt anyway. I started off my drive with the usual music playing...KLove. That's right, I love listening to some uplifting Christian music. I always manage to hear the perfect songs or lyrics to just touch my heart. As I turned to the radio station, it wasn't coming in clear at all. It always comes in clear so I wasn't really sure what that was about. After messing with the silly radio tuning for a bit, it still wasn't coming in. So I turned down the volume and decided to have some good prayer time with Jesus. I went through a list of people I wanted to pray for, I thanked Him endlessly for all the blessings He's given me, and then before I knew it, I was in tears. 


The more I let my emotions take over, the more I though back to the song Blessings by Laura Story. Here's the chorus of her song:


'Cause what if your blessings come through rain drops, what if your healing comes through tears. What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near. What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

How incredibly beautiful, mysterious and true are her simple yet profound lyrics. And the more I thought on those lyrics, the more my tears of despair turned to tears of absolute abandonment. Jesus, the love of my life, died for me and rose again brining me new life in Him and through Him. And it is in Him and Him alone that I will be fulfilled. I cannot even explain the depth of what my prayers consisted of this morning, yet I felt moved to share a bit of what I experienced as well as share the lyrics that I found so rewarding as well as painful to reflect on. 


But that is not where my journey ended! Jesus always has a way of stretching me to my limits. He never, ever breaks me, but always stretches me. Oh, how I love His works. 
So getting back on track, after I finished a nice long prayer session with my Man, I turned on the radio and went back to KLove. Lo and behold, it was coming in perfectly clear! And of all the songs to be playing, I just had to smile as I heard the one song I've been listening to on repeat literally all week. Lord, I Need You by Chris Tomlin. There are a couple verses in this song I just want to share that always stand out to me. Ah...such a captivating song this one is. 


Lord, I need You, oh I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousnessOh God, how I need You

Where sin runs deep, Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me

And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You
Jesus You're my hope and stay

So, after much contemplation, thanksgiving, and prayer throughout the song, I spent the next hour or so just singing my heart out to the music and driving nice and slow as I was surrounded by fog. It was the kind of fog in which you literally just can't see anything ahead of you or beside you. Why is it even important that it was foggy? Well, let me tell you this. It wasn't until over halfway through the chaotic fog that it finally hit me.

God had been trying to tell me something the whole ride! And finally, after He just didn't give up on me, I realized it. 
As I stated earlier, the past week has just been tiresome and rough. I was focusing all my energy into things that seem so magnified in the here and now, yet in the big picture, aren't so. As I drove through the fog, I'm not quite sure how, but I connected it all. God was showing me that first, He wanted me to say "Yes," to Him once again in taking a step forward in seeing with the eyes of faith. And second, that although I cannot see the whole picture right now (take note of the how the fog was clouding my vision), God will give me clarity and a fuller vision when the timing is right. I just needed to be open to seeing the eyes of faith and trusting in His timing and Him alone.

Goodness gracious, He still leaves me in awe by the second. 
After a long, eventful ride home, I finally made it back just in time for mass. Mass was, of course, breathtaking. And even now as I still may turn to tears and I still might feel weak, I can think back on my very own new beginning that Jesus blessed me with on this Easter Sunday. 


So, my dear friends, I challenge you know to look at your own Easter Sunday today and see what it is that God is doing in your life today. What is it that He's showing you, asking of you, or simply telling you.

I hope my own little journey will touch at least once person. That is my hope. All glory be to God, now and forever. 
Happy Easter Sunday my friends! Feel God's abundant love being poured on you today! He's so in love with you! 

Do Not Despair, But Hope

How extraordinary is our Lord that He would allow us to partake in such a magnificent, painful, and rewarding journey in which we are able to experience the infinite graces of hope.

Just these past couple days God has been pointing out the value and the beauty that hope holds for each of us continually, without fail. It's been such a fruitful realization that although despair and desolation may be knocking on the door to my heart, I am able to find hope in the fact that it is through the periods of desolation and suffering that I can allow myself to grow in Christ. It is in those times that I can entrust my heart fully to Him.

And the perfect, most selfless example to look toward would be dear, sweet Mother Teresa. The countless 50 years of desolation that she faced must've been agonizing. And yet she faced the world with a smile, laughter, and fully giving of her self.

Jesus, it is my prayer to follow in her ways. To say yes to the desolation that you will allow me to go through to get to You. I want to love like never before and it is only through You that I can do so. Day after day I am placing my hope in You.

"I consider that the suffering of this present time are as nothing compared with the glory to be revealed for us." - Romans 8:18

"For in hope we were saved. Now hope that sees for itself is not hope. For who hopes for what one sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait with endurance." - Romans 8:24-25

"Do not think that love in order to be genuine has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies."- Mother Teresa